Male Menopause:Is it real or just an excuse?  is male menopause an embarrassing issue

You are working your tail off to make ends meet around the house and one day your husband of twenty years comes home all excited like a little boy and says “Come look, come look, I bought myself a new car!” or maybe he starts to complain about the ironing, yes the same ironing you have been doing all along. He is suddenly moody and really unpredictable.

During this time some men have been known to turn away from their wives and families and pick up new younger women, faster cars and new boy toys. They do not seem to care about what they have cared about all along. They are acting like they have this once chance to restart their lives again and boy do they go at it with some gusto.

This time of life occurs between the ages of 35 to 55 and effects all men to one extent or the other. To women this is the time in their life where they believe things should be settled and happy. So what is happening to the man in their life? Is it just a whim where they feel they are getting older and are trying to recapture their youth or is there more to it than that?

Well ladies and men, it is real, it is documented and it called male menopause or better known as andropause. Males will at this time go through some very specific events and will affect all aspects of their lives and their families.

Males will have to deal with changes in:

  • mental
  • emotional
  • sexual
  • physical
  • psychological

If you can wrap your mind around this one fact you will get an idea of what men go through. This time in their life is worse than any puberty.

The biggest problem with male andropause is that it is so misunderstood and men simply will not talk about they. They deny the problem exsists and will speiel out only that they worked all their lives and now it is time to play and blah blah blah. They may not understand why they are feeling that way and so make up reasons that sound reasonable. (I have an uncle that changed his name from his real name to “the carver” left his family and wife with 8 kids and went to live on the beach in Hawaii). This was not a fly by night thought, he felt driven to do this.

Doctors have identified seven changes while in male menopause:

  1. Spirtual needs- Whatever they are doing they will either go extreme with it or cut it out of their lives. They feel this magnetic yearning to become one with their soul.
  2. Relationships-Usually men at this time will try to keep their distance from those that know them the best and will begin new relationships to fill the void.
  3. Hormone Changes-Yes the driving force in the outwardly signs of andropause is a mans hormones. Testosterone and Thyroid are just two that drop low.
  4. Thoughts- They are consumed with new feelings and needs and so they can become unable to make decisions, anxious or depressed.
  5. Sex- With the lowering of hormones problems with sexual function grab at their attention. It makes them feel older, unable to please a woman and worry that it might be permanent and they will never sexually function again, then if they try, they are consumed with worry and are more apt to be impotent. A horrible vicious circle ensues.
  6. Physical- Yes middle age problems like the hair turns grey, weight starts to come around the belly and they may even notice memory lapses.
  7. Social Skills-They feel awkward in company or to the other extreme they become the life of the party to prove that the still have “it”

Male menopause does not need to be some horrilbe thing just as female menopause does not. But it does need to be understood and communication has to be vital to the process. Men and women need to through these things together so do not go adrift and change the direction of their lives where they really don’t want it to go.

Filed under: Men's Issues

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